Dating as a Non-Vegansexual (an iEatGrass Reroute)

Happy Friday! I am rerouting you to my Lusty Vegan column on pop-vegan culture portal, where I talk about dating as a non-vegansexual.

I recently read a Huffington Post article by Maya Gottfried about dating as a vegan titled Dating as a Vegan: Honesty is the Best Policy and it spurred my own rant about my experience, plus some snippets of conversation between vegan entrepreneur Kristin LaJeunesse and I. Here is a nice little sampling:

After our interview in the fall, Kristin and I kept in touch talking about boys, food (and boys), life (and boys), and romance (and boys). It doesn’t take the crispiest carrot in the bag to see that Kristin is a hopeless romantic; she started a site dedicated to vegan weddings.

 On the last morning of her stay with me, over a couple of smoothies in my kitchen, we talked about dating and how important compatibility is, and how—for those interested in living a cruelty-free lifestyle—compatibility when it comes to ethical choices can be a huge issue.

Earlier in her trip I had told her my most recent story of romance: I spent most of fall of 2011 falling for my best friend of the past decade, When Harry Met Sally style. I told her all about hop-scotching out of the friend-zone and playing “guess where I want to put that!?!” After she asked about who made the first move, she posed The Big Question: Is he vegan?

No, he isn’t. Kristin and I admitted that neither of us are vegansexuals. Would we like to fall for a plant-eater? Of course. But from our experience, finding a guy who we really connect with who is also a vegan and SINGLE is even harder than getting our vegan custard to set. You see, compatibility is key, but for me, veganism is only one part of what makes someone a good fit. Other factors include temperament, politics, beliefs, habits, and more. Do I want someone to share my love for tempeh reubens and fuzzy-headed baby chicks? Sure. But I also want someone who is supportive, passionate, driven, smart, funny, attentive, caring, and—of course—a total tiger in bed. And what if I find that person and, sh*t, he also likes to cook up a steak on his George Foreman? When I think of my own relationship, the thought of missing out on the past handful of blissful so-in-love-my-face-is-numb months because my man eats meat is laughable. Scoffable, even.

In her article Gottfried talks about a guy who ditches a second date due to a hangover. He was a vegan, but even that didn’t ensure their lifestyles aligned. During my conversation with Kristin, she said “Just because you find a guy who is single, and vegan, it doesn’t mean you’re going to be compatible. Plus, being vegan doesn’t guarantee they are a good person.”

Read the rest of the article here!


About SexyTofu

Good food. Good sex. Good fun.
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2 Responses to Dating as a Non-Vegansexual (an iEatGrass Reroute)

  1. You are a very sassy writer. Wish I could be as free with my prose. It’s no wonder you have so many followers.

  2. Amanda says:

    As a vegan married to another vegan, I have to admit that it’s nice to share this lifestyle choice in a relationship. I was initially vegetarian when we started dating and made the full transition about a year later once I realized what cruelty I was still contributing to. We’ve now been together six years, married three and there’s one area where I can say it’s made it slightly easier to both be vegan than our couple friends in a “split” marriage (one vegan one omnivore): raising our children. When we conceived our daughter there was no question about whether or not we’d raise her vegan. Our “split” friends however, are still arguing about how they’ll raise the children they haven’t even had yet. So I suppose if you do end up getting serious with an omni, just like any other serious beliefs in your life (religion, politics, whatever), you’re better off sorting those details out before you say “I do.” 🙂

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