Astroglide Inspired Me to Harass My Friends About Their Fantasies

Okay, I know what you’re thinking.  Another post about lube! But Astroglide—hoorah for vegan lube!—recently put out a survey about the most popular bedroom fantasies and published the results! Their top responses were as follows: Getting’ it on somewhere exotic, doing a dude (or lady) in uniform, sex in public, taking control and having more than one person at once. None of those are really all that surprising, so here is a list I have cultivated through very extensive and professional research. (Getting my friends drunk and harassing them with inappropriate questions about their sex lives.)

Audio Arousal-Lots of people use music to set the pace, but what about having one person wear a pair of those huge hipster headphones while their partner picks the tunes. With only one half of the party listening, it feels secretive, making things a a bit more interesting—for the one listening at least. Take turns switching off.

Bon Voyeur! – A bit creepy but still hot. Hide in the closet (or peek around a shower curtain) while your man or woman comes in, undresses, and gets down to business solo. Come in and help out if you want.

Ravishment- Also known as “play rape.”  This can be appealing for both the dominating and the dominated. However, for obvious reasons, it can be dangerous, so always have a code word. Blueberry! Also maybe a code hand signal, in case for some reason you can’t speak. Uh…what?

Pants Down in Public—Similar to putting out in public, this one entails being caught givin’ yourself a little TLC in a public place, and then having a stranger or acquaintance walk in on you and offer to give you a helping hand. Very risky because it would be more likely that the stranger would offer to call the cops…

The Home Wrecker – This involves shakin’ the sheets with someone who has children, while the children are in the house. Knowing you need to be extra quiet makes it extra juicy.

The Drive By- This one involves driving side by side with a huge truck and touching yourself while the trucker watches. Cool in theory I guess, but I make 9 hour drives down south (hah, no really!) all the time, and all the truckers I pass are seriously creepy. Once a friend had a trucker pull a video camera on her, and all she was doing was driving! So imagine where she would have popped up on the internet if she was givin’ her passion pit a playful poke…

Lost in Translation—Sexing up someone who doesn’t speak your language. Actually they also specified it was a maid or house keeper who doesn’t speak their language, but I veto that part of the fantasy because I CAN. I think it would be hot to pick up anyone and somehow convey nonverbally that you want to remove their clothing with your teeth. Also then you could say hilarious things to them mid coitus and they wouldn’t understand you.  I HAVEN’T BATHED IN 2 DAYS SO I HOPE THAT TASTES NICE. Oh, gross.

What do you think of my friends’ fantasies? Weird? Hot? Sociopathic? Oooh, or be super ballsy and tell me some of your fantasies! I wanna know know know!

Advertisements

About SexyTofu

Good food. Good sex. Good fun.
This entry was posted in Fetish Confession, Sex and tagged , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

11 Responses to Astroglide Inspired Me to Harass My Friends About Their Fantasies

  1. Dare I say that I am absolutely amazed by the audio arousal. I mean, there are some songs that would just be perfect. I’m going to get started on that immediately, would you like to be my trial run? Just kidding. Thank you for spunking up my spanking. Also, I think that a great reminder to the ravishment part is that it’s pretty necessary to be degraded. It’s all for fun, and it should be with someone you are comfortable with, but I think that is for sure the best fantasy of them all 🙂

  2. Adam says:

    First of all, I just want to give you props for your use of mid coitus. Well played sexytofu, very well played. I also couldn’t agree more about being able to say whatever you’d like (mid coitus) druing the “Lost in Translation” fantasy… that’s definitely a part of the intrigue… However! I would like to respectfully disagree with your use of veto on the housekeeper/maid aspect, as I personally believe another part of the intrigue stems from gettin hot and steamy with someone you’re not really “supposed” to get hot and steamy with. But I digress.

    Also, you should change “Pants Down in Public” to “Pants on the Ground”, purely for my own personal amusement L; lol.

  3. Adam says:

    Also, I’m gonna have to go ahead and wholeheartedly agree with Sarah in terms of the “Ravishment” fantasy. I’d even go so far as to say that it is the quintesential sexual fantasy, if it weren’t for the more obvious “Multiple Partners” fantasy. Degrading and physically dominating (to a certain degree; again Sarah’s spot on about it having to be with someone you’re thouroughly comfortable with) your partner (or vice versa) is easily one of the most sensually satisfying ways to get off. Combine that with the multiple partners fantasy, and you’re cookin with gas (or your choice of a suitable earth-friendly alternative). lol.

    • sexytofu says:

      Now you see I disagree here about it being more popular than a multiple partners fantasy! Not everyone gets hopped up by a play rape scenario, ESPECIALLY the one being victimized. AND not everyone wants to try to pin someone to a bed while they flail and scream and (pretend to) defend themselves. Maybe just the weirdos who stumble onto Sexy Tofu 😉

      • Adam says:

        Ahaaa, well see now, I never said it was more popular than the multiple partners scenario (and neither did Sarah for that matter!); in fact, I made it a point to say that if NOT for the obvious multiple partners fantasy, THEN the “play rape” scenario may be considered the quintessential sexual fantasy.

        However, now that you bring it up, I do believe that the “play rape” scenario very well could be more “popular” in terms of how many people actually think about and desire it, versus the multiple partners scenario which is definitely more openly discussed and socially “acceptable”, but may not be as secretly desired.

        This sounds like a great topic for a poll (; lol

      • sexytofu says:

        Perhaps I am wrong but I think if you asked people if they would rather have a threesome or pretend to be raped/rape someone, people would go with the former. Ravishment can be offensive to a ton of people who think it is gross/sadistic/horrible to get off on that! Google it, there are forums!

  4. Food For Thought says:

    I’m going to have to intervene here… I know this conversation is all in good fun, but I just want to add my two cents. As a rape victim, I agree with SexyTofu in that many would find this fantasy very offensive. The fact that it’s been said that rape is so “secretly desired” is verging on creepy… ok, no.. it is creepy. I get that dominating or being dominated is sexy… but only to a certain extent. I’ve never understood people getting off on “play rape”. I don’t think I feel this way just because of my past. I agree that a threesome has much more appeal.

  5. Pingback: Are you a Vegansexual? Find out on Vegan Mainstream « Sexy Tofu

  6. Pingback: The Dirty Dozen: 12 Bonerjams for 2012 « Sexy Tofu

  7. Pingback: Fetish Friday: Shredding « Sexy Tofu

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s