Setting the mood is essential for good sex. Sometimes, the perfect mood comes naturally–maybe you haven’t seen each other in two months and are more grabby than a group of teenage girls at a Justin Bieber concert; maybe you’re two drinks in and the night is still young; maybe you’re feeling super in love and all that mushy gushy crap–and you need no help what-so-ever. But eventually, the newness, soft lighting or half-bottle of Pinot Noir is going to wear off, and you’re going to need to set the mood.
For those of you who haven’t been following along from the beginning (meaning everyone aside from my mother..Hi Ma!) Sexy Tofu sprouted from a column I wrote for my college newspaper, titled Sex, or Something Like It. I began writing the column when I realized neither of our school papers had a sex column, when clearly ( err I mean, sadly) college kids care more about sex than politics, changes in the cafeteria menu or which alumnus got married recently. The column was a big hit, and when the editor graduated that spring, I was asked to put on my big girl panties and take his place.
Anyways, Sex, or Something Like It took up an entire page with an article, a couple Q &A questions, and what I labeled Boner Jams (thank you, Judd Apatow). In the Boner Jams section I would suggest (often jokingly..) songs to get down to, organized by mood. For example:
If you’re feeling aggressive, try Closer by Nine Inch Nails.
If you have a food fetish, check out Carry Out by Timbaland featuring Justin Timberlake or Cookie Jar by the Gym Class Heroes.
If you’re feeling super sweet, cozy up to This Years Love by David Gray or Highschool Lover by Air.
If you have ADD get it on to any Girl Talk track, or pull a marathon to the entire Feed the Animals album.
Lots of the stuff I suggested I might not actually listen to, but think it’s either A good mood music or B a funny idea (ever tried getting sexy to Weird Al Yankovich? Now there’s a thought..).
Recommending songs to get it on to is difficult, because different things put different people in the mood. I had a girlfriend who liked watching chick-flicks before sex–sort of like porn, except the polar opposite. Some people don’t like to have sex with music, and some people can’t have sex without music. Some people like candles, and some people like lots of leather and a rubber apple in their mouth. Whatever, it’s all good.
Don’t be scared to try different mood-setting techniques. If you or your partner doesn’t like it, you can try something else. Make a playlist, set your iPod on shuffle, raid the fridge, dim the lights–whatever gets you there. Also,as if I don’t stress this enough–a little lube goes a long way! Hmm, what?