So I know it’s been a while since I’ve gotten sexy on here. This is partially because I was participating in VeganMofo, therefor trying my very best to post about vegan food and cooking as often as possible.
I used to think I was the type of girl who would try anything once, but after learning about this interesting (read: weird) fetish I’ve changed my mind on that…
Ballooning, called ‘looning’ by partakers (who are dubbed ‘looners’), is a fetish where individuals get all hopped up with balloons, using them to stimulate themselves and/or others. They also enjoy the excitement of inflating and popping balloons, the smell and texture of the balloons, and “necking” the balloon — stretching the neck of the balloon out to elongate it. The excitement of popping seems to derive from the anticipation of blowing up the balloon, and of not being sure how much air their latex love-bubble can take before it reaches its limit. Maybe looners were children who were traumatized by extremely loud balloon explosions as a child — perhaps at the hands of a merciless older sibling — or who those inhaled too much helium at a birthday party and somehow got the funny idea that while boys still have cooties, balloons are sexy. And of course for looners (and, let’s admit it, everyone else) the bigger the erm, balloon, the better.
There is a whole fetish culture for looners — Blogs, mass amounts of internet porn (my computer now has a balloon-shaped virus..), and looning parties where everyone dresses up in fetish gear (think leather and spandex..or nothing at all) and gets down to blowing and popping. Looners include the sexually adventurous, your average guy who just so happen to pop a boner for popping balloons, and of course a bunch of pedophiles who like watching little girls run around with party balloons. Shudder.
Like any other group of fetishists (hello, Twihards) looners have weird terms for different looning festivities. “B2p” stands for Blow to Pop, which apparently is extremely exciting. “S2P” stands for Sit to Pop and can actually offer sexual relief — I would know, Urban Dictionary told me. There are also different categories of looners. “Poppers” get off by the actual popping of the balloon, while “non-poppers” (not very creative, is it?) enjoy the inflating and the feel of the balloon at its best. I would like to get the poppers and non-poppers in a room and challenge them to a duel. Something tells me the poppers would triumph.
To me, the best part about looning is that it doesn’t even have to include a balloon. Apparently, a pool toy works just as well. While I don’t think looning is for me (although if it was I definitely would be a popper..), no judgements here. Whatever floats your, uhm, balloon. Okay, I have to go clear the history on my computer lest my boyfriend log on and decide to get me a jumbo-sized bag of balloons for Christmas.