Vegetarians have better sex

Vegetarians do it better. No really, we do. Alright, well maybe only conscious vegetarians, those who are actually concerned with the food they put into their bodies, and who know that what they are munching effects everything our bodies do, from increasing regularity (hey now, everybody poops!) to getting a good night sleep ,to jump starting our sex drives.

I don’t want to lump all veg headss together now, because I know a couple whose diets consist of grilled soy cheese, ramen and pickles, and they’re probably not having such great sex ( too much salt and processed faux cheese = bloatyfartymess= no one wants to touch you).

But you don’t have to be a vegan to reap great sex benefits from food. I’m not talking the typical ‘aphrodisiac’ bull crap, like falliciously shaped foods (mmm, cucumber…) or foods that somehow got linked to the female genitalia- how many of you have seen a fig shaped vagina? really now.  Try incorporating these yummy bites into your diet as often as you can, and your husband /girlfriend /the pizza delivery guy who you tip orally  will thank you for it.

Spice up your life– Zingy flavors such as cayenne pepper, cinnamon,  curry, licorice, turmeric and ginger all increase your circulation, which gets your blood flowing and your organs moving.  This means quicker erections for men, and easier lubrication for ladies. Sprinkle some cinnamon on your morning oatmeal, cook up a batch of gingered greens or munch on some black licorice before your honey heads over.

Fat doesn’t only look good on your ass–  Ever heard of heart-healthy fats?  Well your heart isn’t the only thing that can benefit from a little EVOO. Your hormones, testosterone and estrogen, are processed in your liver, which also metabolizes fat. More fat (the good kind) = higher doses of horny hormones= vroom vroom down south. What do I mean by the good kind? Polyunsaturated and monounsaturated, which raise your HDL (good cholesterol) and lower your LDL( bad cholesterol) . These help clear your arteries and get your blood flowing to where you need it most. These fats  can be found in foods like avocados, olives, nuts and  flax seeds. Keep in mind that only the good kind of fat  will help you out; saturated fat (found in dairy and other animal products) will have the opposite effect, as it is difficult to digest, clogs your arteries and will leave you feeling heavy and lethargic, a one way ticket to “not now I have a headache” or “but Law and Order SVU starts in ten minutes…”

I like to eat, eat, eat, apples and bananas! No need to bring that can of whipped cream under the covers, because naturally sweet things, like bananas, sweet potatoes and yams , if eaten on a regular basis, will make you taste sweet as well. On the same note, acrid things like broccoli, brussel sprouts and garlic will make your flavor a little funky.

Work up a sweat: Alright, not a food, but exercise will only help your sex drive. Working out increases confidence (slammin’ body= finding excuses to show it off) , improves circulation and blood flow, and clears out toxins in your system (through sweating and heightened respiratory function, ie heavy breathing).  There is nothing sexier than a body glistening in sweat..talk about pheromones! Also, it doesn’t hurt to take advantage of all the eye candy roaming the gym (“not now chief, I’m in the f”ckin zone!”) Just don’t let your lovebunny know you’re really thinkin’ about the hottie that was on the treadmill in front of you….

Orgasms for breakfast– Again, not exactly food per se, but for some reason, reaching orgasm with nothing in your stomach intensifies the experience by a tenfold. Perhaps it’s because you don’t have dinner sloshing around in your gut, or because your body isn’t expending any energy on digesting. However, it does seem to be more difficult to get there with your stomach growling, but give it a try and i guarantee you will be pleased with the result.

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About SexyTofu

Good food. Good sex. Good fun.
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